So there I was, sitting at my desk wondering what the hell I was going to post today when a co-worker in the cubicle adjacent to me receives an email, but not just any email, an invitation to join Fuckbook.
And suddenly, like a blot of lightning thrown from Zeus himself, I became fucking inspired!
The way I see it, Fuckbook is the pinnacle of the social media revolution that has been exploding on the internet over the past few years.
I say this because it is my firm belief that once you strip away all the niceties and all the bullshit that society forces us to engage in, you’d probably find that 80 – 90% of what motivates people to do the things they do (especially people in their 20s and 30s) is sex.
And that’s what Fuckbook offers right? A no bullshit platform for people who just want to have sex without the hassle of having to tip toe around the issue over the course of countless romantic dinner-and-a-movie dates only to find out, after all that effort, that the other person is rubbish in bed or actually just wanted to be your friend (ouch).
So I asked a good buddy of mine, Jasey-got-the-aceys, who is a Fuckbook user to give me the lowdown and he was more than happy to answer some questions.
So here it is folks, cut and pasted right outta MSN – my interview with Jacey-got-the-aceys.
Today’s topic: Fuckbook.
SlickTiger says:
Dude, i gotta idea for a killer post based on a conversation we had once
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
whats that man?
SlickTiger says:
fuckbook
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
oh sick
SlickTiger says:
but i gotta pick your brains for a bit before i write it, gotta do some research y’know?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
cool man
SlickTiger says:
i can use a secret name for you if you like?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
Jasey-got-the-aceys is cool
SlickTiger says:
radass!
so lay it on me – step one is you sign up right? and it’s free?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
okay ya you sign up its free, find a hot chick pester her
SlickTiger says:
Um, ok
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
till she says hello charm her (generally more open over itnernet)
SlickTiger says:
did you sign up under your real name?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
ya man
SlickTiger says:
and made a profile like on facebook?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
ya man
SlickTiger says:
with a real pic of you or a fake one?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
cant remember
SlickTiger says:
ok, so then do you start friending people?
how do you find them?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
search the age range you interested in
females and find one with a full body shot
SlickTiger says:
aha! and are a lot of them naked in their profile pics?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
lingerie or covering boobs
with hands
SlickTiger says:
the classic shot! ok, so you search for them, find one you dig and send a friend request?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
ya, then if you get a reply you know she is keen
SlickTiger says:
then once you’re friends you can see each other’s entire profile?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
ya man
SlickTiger says:
ok, so then what?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
start chatting about common things
over email
SlickTiger says:
wait, actually, first tell me how many chicks you have fucked so far through fuckbook
just the one?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
none but 1 through facebook
SlickTiger says:
howcome?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
got over it
forgot about it
SlickTiger says:
were the chicks not so hot?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
they were hot just got over it
you can also request different fetishes
ahh been doing some searching around and found out why i gave up
you have to pay
SlickTiger says:
what? the site or the chicks?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
the site
SlickTiger says:
aha! so it’s free only up to a point?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
ya
SlickTiger says:
ok, so you just dicked around a little, and got bored of it?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
exactly
it can still be a rad post,
SlickTiger says:
ok, gimme some dirt man!
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
is much like the game
except easier
that is counteracted by the amount of psychos out there
so what you have to do is start chatting on a social networking site
then get a mobile number and sms
dont phone this is imperative until you sure they are cool once you have them on the phone you know they will be comfortable around you in person. by this stage you should have got a feel for them, to decide if they a psycho or not
ask them personal questions… the great thing is you have nothing to loose and everything to gain. If you want them to send you an MMS you NEVER send it first
create a meeting place in a crowded place so if they lied to you, you can get out of there
and you will be safe
have the meeting then its like any normal date
but once the deed is done and you not keen on them, delete all known communication with them, block mobile number spam email and send them back into cyber obscurity
If you want to lash this particular internet ho, go ahead and then render her useless into cyber obscurity
how is that?
SlickTiger says:
hm, i think i can use it…
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
sick
SlickTiger says:
how did you nail facebook chick?
Jasey-got-the-aceys says:
by doing that
i can give you pics if i still have them?
SlickTiger says:
um, not a good idea
the internet’s much smaller than you think, was she a hottie?
Jason says:
ya man she was too tall though
the reason i kicked her to the curb is
she is fucking cooked in her head talks like a child constantly cannot have a grown up conversation and just generally needs to put her head back on the right way around
Huh. So there you have it. Questions, anyone? (You can check out my man Jacey-got-the-acey’s blogsite here: http://shavinginthegutter.blogspot.com/)
-ST
