Posts Tagged ‘pwned

30
May
12

Diablo III Update – Vast Improvement

diablo_3My last post about D3 wasn’t very complimentary because, to put it simply, the game wasn’t working for shit.

Good news is that Blizzard have sorted out the “Error 37” issue and I’ve finally been able to log some solid game time (much to the detriment of my sex life).

I’ve only been playing the Starter Edition but D3 already has it’s claws in me. Like its predecessors, Diablo III is dark, atmospheric and badass. The art direction on the game is insane, as is the level of detail. It’s still early days for me playing this game, but here’s what I like so far:

In-game physics:

When I first read about the fact that the game has physics I honestly didn’t give a shit. So some stuff falls down super-realistically, awesome. Stop the press.

Having played the game though, I can attest to what an awesome difference this makes to the gameplay. A LOT of shit is destructible – everything from tables to tombstones get wrecked while you’re slaying hell’s minions, who scatter in every direction as you obliterate them.

 

 

By taking out support beams, you can bring entire walls crashing down on the bad guys or do the classic unhook-the-chain move to bring chandeliers crashing down on them. Sure, you don’t need them, but they add to the overall aesthetic appeal of the game.

Artisans:

Think of artisans as merchants that you can train. It ain’t cheap, but you can pay artisans to level up and as they do, the weapons, armour and miscellaneous trinkets they can forge become more and more hardcore.

Artisans can “craft” magical weapons for you provided you supply the right crafting materials. You salvage these materials from the magical items you give to artisans. It makes more sense to do this than to just straight up sell the items.

Your artisans travel with you throughout the game, like groupies, so you don’t have to start over with new ones at the beginning of every Act.

 

Follower banter:

It’s a pretty minor feature of the game, but I thought it was also a nice touch. Unlike the mercenaries in Diablo II, who followed you around everywhere, fought through hell with you, but didn’t utter a damn word, the followers you amass in D3 aren’t shy to engage in some random banter from time to time.

It probably gets a bit irritating eventually, but I thought the way your followers chat with you while you’re missioning around looting and slaying everything in sight was pretty cool.

Classic example – my Monk randomly asks the Templar Knight that’s decided to hang out with him if he has any friends back at the order.

“My fellow Templars are like brothers to me,” replies the Templar, “it is a bond that goes far beyond mere friendship.”

To which my monk fires back with, “So I take it you have no friends then…”

 

 

It’s not all good news though. Like I’d said before, if you’re trying to run the game on minimum specs on a Macbook, prepare yourself for some intense running-through-molasses moments when the action picks up.

Also last night the game started bugging out in a big way – rendering blue squares instead of landscape and stuttering so badly that my Monk ended up running over the same patch of ground about 20 times to make it to a checkpoint so I could exit and restart.

Bottom line is I’m hesitant to get the full version until I have a rig that can handle it. I want to be able to crank the graphics up to the max, sit back and enjoy every second of the experience rather than bulldozing through the game in perpetual slow motion because I refuse to play without anti-aliasing, physics and high textures.

The good news I guess is that you won’t have to read any more shit about D3 on the site, fuck yeah!

For now… Winking smile

-ST

16
Apr
12

The Tiger Hits Up Holland, Relaxes To The MAX

tulipssThat’s right bitches! Your Tiger pal is in Holland, relaxing to the maximum at his sister’s place in Bergen, 40 mins outside Amsterdam where it’s a balmy 6 degrees at present.

I know what you’re all thinking right now and I’m just gonna stop you dead in your tracks and say no. I’m not planning on visiting any coffee shops during my stay.

This isn’t my first time in Holland, I’ve done this twice before and both times I did the touristy let’s-see-how-many-different-strains-of-marijuana-we-can-smoke thing and holy balls, it did not end well.

I’m older now, more mature and to be perfectly frank, not keen to spend the better part of a day hiding under the table in a random coffee shop because the parries has eroded my self-confidence to the point where even the simple act of standing up and leaving the room fills me with mortal terror.

 

 

So I’m taking it super easy breezy. As you read this I want you to picture me in my PJs with a hot cuppa java, sitting in my nephew’s room literally surrounded by screens (5 to be exact) and about to engage in a serious Black Ops marathon.

I need to brush up on that shit yo. My nephews (who are 8 and 14) and I have been playing on the Playstation Network, which has been pretty humiliating to say the least.

My average game goes as follows:

Slick’s Interior Monologue (SIM): BOOM! Game on, bitches! Ok… KILL THESE GUYS! Oh wait, they’re on my team… They look like they know shit, I’m going to follow th-

DEAD

SIM: Woah, what the fuck?! Who did that?! Oh wait, back in the game, bit-

DEAD

SIM: Come the fuck on! Ok, enough fucking around, next asshole I see gets a lead salad in his FACE! I’m just gonna run up these stairs and do a little camping… this shit’s foolproof… come to papa… any minute now… THERE! THAT GUY! DIE MOTHE-

DEAD

SIM: HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?! I WAS SHOOTING RIGHT AT HIM! I SWEAR TO GOD THESE GUYS ARE-

DEAD

SIM: Ok, this is getting a little-

DEAD

Slick to Nephew 1: Who are these people, man?! They’re handing our ASSES to us!

Nephew 1: I know, I’ve only got 5 kills so far.

Slick: What?! How is that humanly poss-

Nephew 1: Six kills. Haha! Caught a guy camping, what a jerk.

Slick: Yeah… I hate it when they do tha-

DEAD

Slick: OH COME ON! I WASN’T EVEN WATCHING THAT TIME! I’m done man. I’m out. These guys are pros. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re actually seen action in real life.

Nephew 1: I doubt it. A few are playing with headphones and I’m pretty sure the person who just killed you is either a girl or a kid who’s voice hasn’t broken yet.

Slick: FML.

 

 

So if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to immerse myself in a whole lot of (hopefully) killing for the rest of today, so yeah.

Have fun at work Knipogende emoticon

-ST