Them's Fightin' Words

I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot about this whole voodoo demon T-shirt thing and I may have inadvertently scared all of you out of actually bidding for that godawful, demon-possessed piece of hell lovely and stylish piece of clothing.

Let me just say this once and for all so you don’t all get nightmares and wet the bed – the T-shirt I’m offering for the Nerdies ’10 raffle isn’t actually possessed by demonic spirits, it’s just a normal T-shirt. It won’t make you turn into a gargantuan, destructive force of nature when you put it on and I promise it won’t make you want to eat anyone.

See, what I was doing there was indulging in a little bit of fiction (you can read the original post here) a flight of fantasy if you will, in order to pique people’s interest in what is otherwise a normal T-shirt (a seriously radass T-shirt, but it doesn’t give you superpowers) so that you guys would go wild and in a frenzy of bidding, end up buying the shirt for somewhere upwards of R5k.

Then I realised I didn’t really explain the auction itself very well and maybe that’s what the real problem is here, so here’s the dealy-o. You have to go to this website and scroll down in the comments section (scroll right to the bottom) and find my thread about the shirt and start bidding. Don’t be a stingy fucker, if you give money with an open heart it comes back to you x3, fact.

I can’t really say I’m surprised though. I did some charity work before once, trying to raise money for the Walter Sisulu Paediatric Cardiac Centre for Africa. The MAEN! and I dressed in drag and ran the Spar Women’s Race and while it wasn’t a pretty sight, we got a damn good time and more wolf whistles than either of us could really handle.

Before I ran, I got people to sponsor me and managed to get about 50 people or so to sign and pledge an amount per kilometre, whether it was R5 or R50. I was stoked by people’s response and it gave me a lot of faith in the generosity of the human spirit. That is, until it came to collection time.

Out of all the people who sponsored me, you know how many actually paid up? Two. Two people, that’s it.

It was quite a wake-up call in a lot of ways because it got me thinking about all the times I’ve donated money to charity and I can’t say it’s been very often, so I’m just as bad as all the people who never paid up. Actually no, I’m not that bad because usually if I say I’m going to do something, I do it.

So let’s do this people. Right now there have been a grand total of (wait for it) THREE bids on the shirt – Angel, SheeBee and my main man, Supa_Dan. We’re currently sitting on R40 for this shirt, which is pretty damn cool as it was designed by Laurent "Lags" Barnard, the guitarist from the English hardcore punk band Gallows.

That fact in itself should fetch at least R150 for this shirt. All proceeds go to Wet Nose Animal Rescue Centre. So let’s lend a helping hand fer chrissake.

I’m re-opening the bidding at R60. Anyone have the stones to top that?

There are upwards of 150 of you who visit this site every day, don’t think I don’t know who you are, I know exactly who you are. I know where you live, where you go to work, your banking details, the whole deal.

Not that I would use that information to, say, destroy your life or anything, all I’m saying is think of the puppies guys, think of the puppies.

-ST