Good day. We here at SlickTiger Industries would like to offer an official apology for the gigantic pile of utter shite featured on the “Them’s Fightin’ Words†website this week.
As a multi-national conglomerate with controlling interests in China, the Middle East and Europe, SlickTiger Industries strives at all times to make your experience on this site a pleasurable one.
Sadly, because “Slicky-T†technically started our organisation and owns 51% of the shares, we have to put up with his child-like behaviour, questionable posting habits and general bad taste because he’s threatened on numerous occasions to fire us all if we oppose him in any way.
In fact, my job would be on the line if he even knew I was posting this, but thankfully the pressures of his working life have finally gotten to him and he’s elected to spend the rest of today dead drunk.
In his absence, we’re seizing control of the site to assure you that the mindless garbage he’s posted this week (Monday’s shockingly bad song about Thanksgiving, Wednesday’s mindless video of eggs being squashed in slow motion and whatever that mangled abortion of a song was he posted yesterday) will never be repeated.
To show you we’re serious, here is a video we would like to share with you that we feel fills an important role in the general enrichment of society and the upliftment of mankind as a species.
Thank you and may you have an enjoyable weekend.
-STI
You’re fired from the Internet.
I love how he turns his head and raises his eyebrows, as if he’s surprised by his own surname.
Ain’t nobody got time for that.