The campaign is now at an end and the Nandos team have finally revealed the origins of its delectable peri-peri sauce and the epic story of the origins of that sauce.
So check it out and tell me, honestly, if you think it’s better or worse than the ad I shot (keeping in mind the bit I mentioned above about the underpants on the OUTSIDE).
What’s the verdict boys and girls? Tell Uncle Tiger.
-ST
No sooner do I post the last epic work time waster than this total badass who goes by the name of Clive Robertson sends me a mail with a game that instantly brought on a flashback of when I was about 8 years old and I used to dick around on my dad’s 386 with Windows 3.1.
I think you know what I’m talking about here people.
ASTEROIDS MUTHUFUKKAHS!
Hit this link to check out this classic “blast-everything-around-you-into-tiny-bits-but-for-fuck’s-sake-avoid-actually-moving-in-any-direction-AT-ALL-COSTS†game all reskinned in shiny new graphics.
Some nice new additions I dug were:
Of course, after about 5 minutes of playing this classic you might be bored stiff, but the nostalgia value makes it worth at least clicking that link for old time’s sake.
TOTAL TIME WASTED: 5 – 10 mins
TOTAL ENJOYMENT LEVEL: 55%
FINAL VERDICT: Mildly entertaining. *Just* beats doing actual work
I think we can do better here people…
-ST
The advertising industry has a bad reputation when it comes to drugs, cocaine in particular, because it’s basically impossible to turn your creativity on and off like a faucet and that’s exactly what the job entails.
So you do a little blow from time to time (to time to time to time to time), you get crazy ideas that normal people don’t have the confidence to so much as utter under their breath in a room full of people and you shout those fucking ideas from the rooftop of your swanky loft apartment at 4 in the morning because FFFFFUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
Par for the course really. But you have to start worrying when the ads you write whilst grinding your teeth to dust in your mouth because you’re so unbelievably high all feature characters who are running around bug-eyed and incoherent and look like they’re unbelievably high.
I’ll never look at cereal bars the same way again.
-ST
I got pretty much nothing floating in the soupy confines of my skull today. The weekend was pretty epic for the most part but for some reason Sunday bummed me out completely so I hid under the blankets for most of the day drifting in and out of vague, unremembered dreams.
Later on I dicked around on the internet endlessly until I found this picture and then laughed for probably the first time all day.
Later masturbators.
-ST
On days like today, everything, all the blood sweat and tears, all the hard work and late hours, all the frustration and drudgery is worth it.
Nothing in this life ever came easy, no siree. We’d never appreciate it if it did, it would just roll on by easy breezy and we’d be left with that ‘hm’ feeling that always accompanies a total anti-climax.
I don’t like writing about my work life on this site, but we’ve been working on something big that lands this weekend, like a gigantic disco from the future, and from what I’ve seen over the past few days, it’s going to melt faces guys, holy shit.
So I feel super-stoked. Like there’s nothing else I could have done to make this any better. Maybe it doesn’t go 100% according to plan, maybe it fucks out a little here and there, I don’t care, there is nothing, nothing I could have done any differently to make this better.
My wish for you, all you crazy kids out there in interwebs-land who read these fightin’ words, is that your Friday brings you the same happiness mine is bringing me.
Let’s sing a song (finally got this shit working), a ditty that goes a little something like this…
Have a killer weekend party people 
-ST
On days like today, everything, all the blood sweat and tears, all the hard work and late hours, all the frustration and drudgery is worth it.
Nothing in this life ever came easy, no siree. We’d never appreciate it if it did, it would just roll on by easy breezy and we’d be left with that ‘hm’ feeling that always accompanies a total anti-climax.
I don’t like writing about my work life on this site, but we’ve been working on something big that lands this weekend, like a gigantic disco from the future, and from what I’ve seen over the past few days, it’s going to melt faces guys, holy shit.
So I feel super-stoked. Like there’s nothing else I could have done to make this any better. Maybe it doesn’t go 100% according to plan, maybe it fucks out a little here and there, I don’t care, there is nothing, nothing I could have done any differently to make this better.
My wish for you, all you crazy kids out there in interwebs-land who read these fightin’ words, is that your Friday brings you the same happiness mine is bringing me.
Let’s sing a song (finally got this shit working), a ditty that goes a little something like this…
Have a killer weekend party people 
-ST
Check it out guys! Fucking slicktiger.co.za, FINALLY!
I’m pretty excited about this even though all my content imported like total shit (all YouTube windows have reverted to non-clickable links, I’ve lost over 50 posts and all the songs I embedded to stream are gone daddy gone) because it’s the first step in finally giving this site a much needed make-over.
It might still look like the rusted old junkheap of a spaceship it always used to be, but you just wait.
Given time (and people willing to work for meatballs) we’ll clean up this new ship and get her up to warp speed before you can say “the Klingons are attacking Uranus!â€
Thanks for making the long trek over here though, if you have any suggestions how I can p1mp this puppy out to the max now that I’m hosting it myself, lemme know.
In the meantime, let’s try embed a song and see if we can get it to stream off the site.
I’m always blathering on about it but I realised the other day that I’ve never shared my favourite Kinks song with you guys.
This little number’s called “Wonderboy†and I find it strangely fitting to ring in a new chapter of the epic tale that is The Ballad Of SlickTiger.
Enjoy 
-ST
Ok, so I’m a little late with this one (the album officially launched in April) and for awhile I wasn’t going to write a review because once an album is older than a month it’s old news to cool kids like us, but I’m making an exception this time around.
Which is the long way around of saying this album is fucking awesome.
The Down Lizzo:
Alison Mosshart pissed me off when I heard her sing in the Jack White-lead supergroup The Dead Weather because it felt like she was faking it. Her vocal style and stage persona seemed contrived, something between Marla Singer and PJ Harvey, and it never sat right with me.
Then I stumbled on The Kills latest album Blood Pressures and literally one minute into the first track I found myself grinning from ear because of how dark and cool Mosshart sounded. Like butter wouldn’t melt on her tongue, like she was everything sexy and dangerous in this world, like she could kill you with a look or break you with a smile.
The Kills is her band, her little broody-beautiful world that she shares with guitarist Jamie Hince and there’s something about the fuzz and the mud and the malevolence and the majesty of it all that haunted me and continues to haunt me with every listen.
Sick Tracks:
Pick one. Go ahead. Close your eyes, wave your finger around and literally let it fall where it may and whatever plays will be awesome.
“You Don’t Own The Road†saunters like a drunk cowboy waving his six shooter with the safety off, “DNA†stalks purposefully through the woods at dusk, picking its way through an undergrowth of drumsticks clattering against drumsticks whilst wading through a quagmire of swampy basslines.
“Baby Says†has the melancholy of a Cowboy Junkies track, a lilting melody to keep you company in the hollow hours before sunrise, a song that echoes back to better times.
But “Future Starts Slow†is still my favourite. Stark, defiant, sexy, it has a drum track that plays like a striptease and one of the simplest, most powerful riffs I’ve heard in a good long while.
Should You Give A Shit:
I loved this album, but what the hell do I know? I got a dark streak a mile wide that this album really speaks to but that doesn’t mean you’ll love it anywhere near as much as I do.
If nothing else, it’s a great example of how simple, stylised riffs (played with truckloads of badass fuzzy effects) layered with amazingly complex drums and sultry, provocative vocals can seduce you to the point of infatuation.
If you want to know what the music playing in the jungles of my Tiger-mind sounds like, get your hands on this album and if you’re anything like me, pretty soon it’ll be playing through the jungles of your mind too.
Here’s “DNA†to sink your fangs into.
[audio: http://slicktiger.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/6-dna.mp3]
Final Verdict: 9/10
-ST
Think about how much shit we can DO in one day thanks to the advent of the internet, emails and direct messaging communication.
I mean holy shit, what took our grandparents two weeks to do (ie. writing, posting and receiving a letter) we can now hammer out in literally 3 minutes and we don’t even have to use VOWELS mthrfkkr!
But where’s the goddamn upside I ask you with tears in my eyes? All that time that we’re saving ourselves, we just fill it with more work, what a load!
Well, I say it’s high time we stick it to the man and take back what is rightfully ours! From now on every time I find an awesome work time-waster I’m posting the link up on this site and filing it in the new category I’ve created on the right called “Awesome Work Time-Wastersâ€.
Hold my hand. Let’s goof off for awhile. Starting with this little gem I found the other day called “Solipskierâ€.
Hit this link and make sure no one’s walking behind you as you jam this fucking intense stickman / skiing game and try to break my all time high score of 1,173,996 (see below for proof).
And feel free to submit your favourite time wasters as well (tellthetiger@gmail.com) and let’s see how quickly we can all get fired!
-ST
We don’t have a TV so it’s been awhile since I’ve been exposed to the wonder that is South African television advertising and I’m a little sad about that.
I love SA TV ads because (with one or two exceptions) they are really, really, really terrible and almost always leave me staring in utter disbelief at the screen or canning myself at how goddamn retarded people are.
But on Saturday night I watched an ad so unbelievably unbelievable that the second it was over I jumped off the couch and shouted, “Did you just see that?! Tell me you just saw that!?†at J-Rab who nodded mutely, on the verge of lapsing into full-blown catatonia.
The ad was for the upcoming Baba Indaba where they are going to attempt to break the Guinness World Record for the most number of moms breast-feeding at the same time under one roof.
Call me an insensitive, immature asshole but MY GOD! How DISGUSTING is that?!
Thousands of pregnant women of all ages, sizes, creeds and colours whipping their swollen mammaries out at the same time while their young suckle at them hungrily like the little parasites they are.
Jayzuz, even writing about it is making me feel ill.
Also, how the hell do you POLICE something like that? I mean the previous world record was set in the Philippines where no less than 3 541 woman “breasted†at the same time!
Three and a half thousand! You’d need a team of literally hundreds of officials walking around making sure the moms weren’t faking it to verify that shit.
How humiliating for the moms, it’s like “Sorry ma’am, I’m gonna have to ask you to lift that blanket.â€
“What? What blanket? This blanket?â€
“Yes, that blanket.â€
“Why, there’s nothing to see under here, just junior having his lunch, that’s all…â€
“The rules state I have to actually see the breast in his mouth while he swallows ma’am, otherwise you’re disqualified.â€
I’m sorry, I know this is a sensitive topic and everything and sure, it’s all for a good cause, I get that, but still, bleaugh!
And the funniest part of it is they show this visual in the ad that’s basically identical to the one below:
“Yummmâ€, seriously? Who are they trying to sell this to?!
What mother is so stupid that she doesn’t know babies like breastfeeding?
“The baby’s saying ‘Yummm’! I get it! It’s saying ‘Yummm’ because it likes milk! Wow, I’m going to try that RIGHT AWAY!â€
Also, think about this – when women breastfeed, oxytocin and prolactin, hormones that relax them and make them feel more nurturing toward their little grubs, are released.
So, if all goes according to plan, at Baba Indaba there will be over three and a half thousand women having the lactate furiously suckled from them at the same time while an ocean of feel-good hormones go racing through their brains, creating a gigantic rush of pure mammalian euphoria that will ripple through Nasrec like a wave of MDMA through a trance fest dance floor.
Huh. Come to think of it, that sounds pretty awesome. Wonder if they’ll fly me up there and swing me free tickets after this awesome post I’ve given them…
-ST
